Torrents of rain beat down incessantly.

Day after day, week after week

Thick grey clouds unburden their load.

And yet more cumulonimbus roll in,

Forming a never-ending deluge,

Under a dense, dark, menacing sky.

Winter walks are sodden underfoot,

Woodland paths transformed into gushing gullies,

Coursing through sticky, saturated Sussex clay.

Rivulets of rain stream down my cheeks, neck.

My wellies squelch, slip and slide,

Striving for purchase on shifting ground.

I feel the density, the pressure within too,

Like I’m wrapped in a tight cocoon 

Of thick, sticky, congealed threads.

They press me down, suffocate my essence.

A deep ache permeates the cells of my bones,

A weariness pervading my being.

Each time I try and force myself through

With well-thought-out strategies,

I’m met with a dark deluge of resistance.

Today I have no fight left.

I call in to Grace,

To the flickering candle of Divinity within. 

Here in the depths of my being,

A warm glow of Love abides.

When I rest here, 

Radiant beams course through my cells, 

Soften my body, lighten my load

And illuminate what blinds and binds me.

These strings of protection enveloping me,

The desire to meet expectations of others,

To serve and please when my body says no,

Are no longer needed.

Deep in this impenetrable darkness, 

Lies a growing trust that I hold the light.

Homecoming is a stripping off,

Of wet skins and clay-caked boots,

A hosing down of muddy paws,

A continuous cycle of scrubbing away

The dirt that clings tenaciously—

A grapple with an impossibly messy task.

With Grace, homecoming becomes

A shedding of skins, of identities,

A falling away of the silken threads,

 Of needs to improve and desires to become,

A laying down of effort,

An opening into Love within.

As snowdrops sprout in muddied ground,

Golden crocuses rise and daffodils bud

To the merry chirp of wren, robin and song thrush,

Joy bubbles up.

A sense of grace and flow sing through my being.

Such is the alchemy of wintering.

A sacred reclamation of Divinity within.