Awakening

A part of me wants to stay curled up under the cover,

Eyes tight shut,

To block my ears from the jostle of noise,

To hide from the starkness of light.

fszalai

A part of me wants to wallow in the sticky goo of victimhood,

Enshrouded in pain, grief and shame,

Entrapped in stale beliefs and worn-out concepts,

Of how to play the game of life.

My truth, my essence, is bold and courageous,

She fiercely yearns to live in freedom,

She knows of the magnitude of Love deep inside,

And delights in sweet, tender glimpses of liberation.

Grace nudges me to gently pandiculate my weary body,

To hold His hand as I face the seeds of resistance, 

To be responsible for tending the wounds, 

And loving myself full—to grow.

I call into the deep expanse of my being,

And feel a powerful upsurge of Love wash over me,

Soaking into every cell in my body,

Scintillating, radiant, enlightening.

I sense the cover, these layers of illusion, 

Slip gently away,

Such sweet surrender to be reborn.

To uncover who I truly am.

I open an eye,

And rise.

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You are Stardust

I know how darkness envelops you at times,

That you exist in a void, lost in space,

Reaching blindly in front, behind, to the sides,

For connection, softness, understanding,

Finding only a lack, an emptiness.

titoOnz

I know how you’ve flirted with anger, grief, misplaced affection,

How you’ve disliked their poison so shut yourself down,

Unwittingly choosing numbness over pain.

I tell you, there is nothing drab in this experience.

It’s a sacred nudge to remember the source of your being.

For you are made of stardust; it’s in your DNA.

Elements within you have been forged in the fiery heat,

And furious death throes of celestial luminaries.

It’s time to stop treating yourself like dirt and coal dust—

You’re being asked to rekindle the flames within.

Accept the heartache, the shame, see the purpose behind their rising,

A burning away of the dross you are not. 

Feel the intense fire of your inner divinity.

Let this supernova be the source of your guidance,

Blazing though barriers of time and space.

You are in a cycle of death and rebirth,

A falling away of old concepts as you awaken to your own radiance,

Creating the divine connection, the understanding you strive for,

As you shine and dazzle with immeasurable light,

Illuminating your own universe and galaxies beyond,

Powered only by Love.

Comments welcome.

This Great Unburdening

This great unburdening of the clouds,
As they release their torrents of rain,
This mass disencumbering of the trees,
As they shed their myriad leaves,
I feel it too. This overwhelming need,
To just let go.
Matt Gibson
Hold my hand, Beloved, rise up within,
Let this burgeoning river of truth and purity,
Coarse through each cell in my body,
Scour the deep dark trammels of my mind,
Dredging up old sediment, hard held concepts,
To set me free,

The shame, anger, despair, I buried so deep,
My old friend, pain, who clings to me still,
You bring them all up in a holy mess,
Of muddy trenches, and trampled leaves,
A stinking swamp of my own making,
And smile,

Knee deep in muck, I see the part I play,
Within the grit and grime of each experience,
It weighs heavy on my being,
A dark storm cloud, full to bursting,
With bounteous drops,
Of understanding.

An Autumn tree laden with glorious leaves,
A kaleidoscope of realisations,
Awaiting liberation.
I hold your gaze and the flood gates open,
The raw power of your Radiance,
Surges through every fibre of my being,

Emptying me out of everything,
I thought to be true,
A tree stripped bare for winter,
The vast calm openness of the sky after a storm.
Filling me up with light and clarity,
You whisper: All is for Love.

The Threshold

Leave your boots at the door, my friend.
The dirt from past roads travelled is not needed here.
Toss your hat to the wind,
And all those thoughts in your head,
The heavy ones you dwell on too often,
And those earthly desires that hook you in.
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Hang up your coat on that peg.
Cast aside your cloaks of identity.
That shabby jacket of unworthiness,
Or the sharp suit of vanity.
Neither one is truly you.
The fire inside will bring warmth enough.

Put down those bags you clutch so close,
Burdened with grief, bursting with misplaced loves,
Even that small pouch of shame you tuck away.
Let’s go through them together, the pain and mistaken joy.
Allow me to help you leave them be,
You will feel lighter without them.

This is the threshold you cross,
Where you shed all you thought you were,
And become what you truly are.
Free your feet and your soul, my dearest one.
Take my hand. Let us listen only to the music of love.
Enter my house and dance.

If this post resonates with you, I’d love to hear, do comment.

The Inner Jungle Trail

Why were we told that success is outside of us?
A mountain of achievements to be climbed.
To thrive at school, in a career, a relationship, as a parent, in life,
Is to strive, through hard-earned effort,
To reach for an ever more distant star.
Stock Photo
Why were we told that accomplishment is a series of accolades?
An amassing of things; a job, a house, a family, a status, an identity,
To swaddle around ourselves, like pretty coverings of shiny gift wrap,
Glittering baubles and eye-catching bows,
To better present ourselves to the world.

Why were we told that God is outside of us?
A man in the clouds, gazing down on His creation.
That to reach Him is through penance or prayer,
A following of rites and rituals, led by others with others, for others,
In a church, a temple, an ashram, built to commune with this Other.

Only to discover that these are all dead ends, avenues of hope to exhaust,
Purposefully placed to bring us to our knees,
So we feel the despair of not finding our raison d’etre,
The bewilderment of having nowhere left to turn. 
For only now, in this dark pit of desperation, are we ready to heed the Call.

A murmur in our consciousness suggests the secret lies inside,
That true wealth is in the realisation of this journey.
These layers of gift wrap are just gaudy distractions,
This Path one of detaching from all we hold dear,
Divesting oneself of beliefs and concepts of what and how life should be.

Gone is the tidy road of dos and don’ts.
This is no clear, well-trodden track we walk with others.
It’s a sprawling tangled mass, in which lifetimes have been invested in its spread.
Vines of desire, thorns of anger, sweet flowers of attachment are to be slashed away.
It’s an individual overgrown jungle trail, leading to one’s true self.

When I stop to listen to the sweet whispers of divinity within,
A beacon radiating waves of truth and love descends.
I stand still in the darkest parts of this tangled mess of me,
Shine light on my sharpest thorns of pain, my deepest roots of regret,
And welcome Love in here. This moment, this Love becomes my prize.

In gifts of revelations, new depths of understanding, forgiveness, humility,
The next knot to be untangled, weed to be uprooted, becomes clear.
My torch, my inner fire, burns brighter, heart aglow with new-found resolve.
The shedding of all I thought I was, gives way to growing realisations of who I am.
This inner Path of becoming Love Divine, is truly my richest reward.

If this post resonates with you, I’d love to hear, do comment.

This Sacred Road

On this path of living my truth,
I bump into all the times I’ve been untrue:
The job endured because I felt I should,
The countless times I’ve said yes to please another,
When every cell in my body was screaming no.
Image: dugdax
The relationship severed and lost,
Because I lacked the courage to speak up,
Or spoke too freely, without discernment,
Of import, of kindness, of truth.
Each misstep, a bruise, a welt, a cut I carry still.

The heavy sandbags of grief, shame and despair,
The concepts I hold, built on values of family, society,
Of how life should be, form solid walls, 
A prison cell around my true self.
They bar my freedom, block my light.

I touch these tender purple lesions,
Soft abrasions, rubbed raw through time,
Deep gashes still bleeding hurt,
Untended wounds, too painful to clean,
And hold each one up to His loving gaze.

I thank each blunder for the blessing it bears,
The insight, the wisdom, the truth of what I am not.
The barricades begin to dissolve,
The bleeding stems, aches recede, and wounds start to heal,
Each scar a testament to this sacred road travelled.

If this post resonated with you, I’d love to hear, do comment.

The Magnificent Storm




I am a rolling rumbling thunder cloud,

For eons gathering droplets of fear, pain and regret,

Cumulating towering beads of fleeting joy or despair,

The child unborn, love affair abated, sense of purpose lost.

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Source: Minerva Studios

 

This dark cumulus mass, heavy with gloom and anger,

Deadened by the flat inevitability of outer experiences,

Dampens all I think, say and do,

Yet ignites inside an intense yearning for truth.

 

 

Lightning strikes; a bolt of Love from deep within,

Illuminating misplaced loyalties within each globule,

Worn out concepts of what and how life should be.

And in this revelation lies the beauty of each and every drop.

 

 

A magnificent storm unfolds. Flashes of lightning

Shine truth on the darkness. Grumbles of thunder;

A calling to let go. Still, this weary cloud grips tight,

On to the burdensome form it knows.

 

 

Drab grey puffballs smother my vision, suffocate my being,

Gaining in weight as I billow aimlessly. Until,

 A thunderous crack of discontent marks my stand with Truth,

On the holy battlefield within.

 

 

A gift of surrender; the sweet release of mind’s grip,

 Brings forth an electric torrent of divine revelations,

A tornado of chaos, flash floods of loss and destruction.

A perfect storm; an emptying of all I thought I was.

 

 

I am lighter, brighter, snow white wisps of cirrus cloud.

Golden rays of inner sunshine burn through my dross,

Bringing clarity, understanding and gratitude as each speck evaporates,

Into the clear vast openness of the divine sky within,

 

 

Until nothing remains but Love.

 

 

If this poem resonates with you, feel free to comment…

In the Eye of the Storm

Rain lashes, wind whips,

Trees uproot, rivers burst their banks,

A torrent of chaos floods our world,

Roads closed, electrics down, homes battered.

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                                                            Source: Mimadeo                                                   

 

I batten down our hatches,

Light the fire in the hearth,

Drink tea, play games with heart aglow,

In appreciation of the refuge of home.

 

In tandem, a deadly virus swarms the globe,

Spreading fear, panic and terror.

A surge of turmoil assaults the senses,

Jobs lost, isolation forced, mortality faced.

 

Within this havoc, I have a choice,

Of where I place my attention.

In the tumult of the tempest,

The everchanging mayhem of the outer.

 

Or in the eye of the storm,

Where fear, apathy, and misplaced loyalties,

Dissolve. All must be let go,

For the sanctity of His refuge within.

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The urgency to support friends, neighbours,

The dread of risking lives, the noise of media,

All rise in a frenzy, an intense inner storm,

Until I soften and open in to Love.

 

The deeper this surrender,

The greater the fire of His Love.

Until it eclipses all,

And my candle becomes His flame.

 

And this mountain of Love within,

Becomes the axis of my being.

All thoughts, words, actions,

A divine co-creation.

 

In the storm’s wake, a trail of blessings unfolds.

Debris shifts, new channels open.

Seeds spread by high winds sprout,

Flood plains become verdant pastures.

 

In the aftermath of the Now,

Exquisite blessings emerge.

For I choose surrender,

The rest is divine alchemy.

 

The sun rises.

Clouds part to reveal a rainbow.

A veil lifts for the whole of humanity,

A new light on an evolving world.

The Master Puzzler

Life is a giant jigsaw,

Thousands of motley shaped pieces;

 Work, family, home, hobbies, relationships,

I try to fit neatly together.

two hands connect the puzzle details, against the sky of the sun.

Image: stock photos

Constantly, I search for the next piece,

A new job, home, dress, diet,

To create a better picture,

Of what life should look like.

 

As I strive harder to find the right one,

To wedge that perfect looking job,

 Into other ever moving parts,

A growing sense of unease arises.

 

For I see that the picture guide,

My mind has been trained to create,

Through parents, school, generations of society,

Is fundamentally flawed.

 

The focus on the piece,

Choosing bright harmonic colours,

Instilled with significant content,

Yet shaped to be compatible,

 

Engenders a striving,

To find perfection in the fragment,

A resistance to viewing the bigger picture,

Where shadows compliment the light.

 

Each branch of the puzzle unending,

The pieces multiply with my attention.

The more I strive, the further and hazier,

The goal seems to be.

 

My attention stays stuck on the outer,

A perpetual desire to change the effect.

What if I change the image?

 Shift my focus to my inner Beloved?

 

Trust that He’s handed me,

 The perfect piece.

And ask for His Love,

 To help me place it.

 

 The one He hands me,

 Is not the easiest to place,

Or the prettiest to look at.

Not what I would have chosen.

 

A dark shadowy fragment.

Sharp edged and oddly angled,

Awkward to handle,

Ugly to the eye.

 

An irksome blast from my past,

 For so long avoided.

A relationship severed,

An attitude entrenched.

 

Through Love’s guiding hand,

These difficult parts of the puzzle,

Transform into the magnificence,

Of realisations hard won.

 

It’s not about the puzzle,

Or the picture it creates,

But seeing that in each conundrum given,

Lies the potential for Grace.

 

For each fragment of karma gifted,

 Becomes sacred when alchemised

By the well of Love within.

Bringing me closer….

 

To mastering the art,

 Of the Master puzzler,

Of becoming the force of Love,

 That guides the way.

 

 To stepping out of the never-ending

Enigma of life,

 And into the ultimate destiny,

Of my own divinity.

The Divine Illuminator

Some days I feel engulfed,

Smothered by the tenacious fetor,

Of past misdeeds, untrue words or harsh thoughts,

That weaken me so I curl up and hide.

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Under a warm duvet of pretence,

False comforts of rich food and wine,

I find paltry balm. Until I awaken,

To the debris I’ve buried myself in.

 

I curse myself for dwelling,

In these dark dingey parts of me.

Yet my attention is stuck here,

Entrenched in dank sticky mud.

 

It’s like a flashlight is exposing all,

This ugly dross I’ve hidden from myself.

The anger that I’d stashed under the carpet,

The grief that I’d placed out of sight.

 

“It’s a gift”, He whispers gently,

Lifting the veil I’d placed over my eyes.

And I see the illuminator of this pain,

The bearer of the torch, is my Beloved.

 

He shows me how each hidden gripe,

Each speck of vanity, fear or remorse,

When seen in the gaze of His compassion,

Is a precious lesson in what I am not.

 

We sweep them up together.

Dredging the channels of my consciousness,

Of these memories, gathered like driftwood,

That weigh me down and block my view.

 

With the eyes of a lioness,

Batting away her precocious cubs,

I throw these children of my creation,

Into the river of His abundant love.

 

And embrace the wisdom they bring.

Unexpected truths gained through harsh experience,

Hard fought attainments released in an instant’s clarity.

The purpose of all lifetimes revolutionised in a flash.

 

I watch the chaff being washed away,

 In a torrent of love that fills my being.

And see that the agony of this illumination,

Is just a calling to embody what I truly I am.

 

In this divine alchemy,

This dissolving of particles no longer needed,

The true me becomes clearer, lighter.

Ready to rise up to a greater radiance.